Controllers in Tension-Reaction

We’ve recently shared about how various factors can affect our reactions to stress and how we all have unique ways of dealing with tense situations. Despite these differences, there are some general trends based on Behavior Styles, and for someone with a Controller preference this means taking control.

It’s okay to step up and take the lead in scenarios where you’re officially in charge, or in urgent situations where no one else is stepping up. But, taking over without the right or in a way that disregards others’ needs can create a negative impact and lasting damage. For someone with a Controller style, the instinct to take control during stressful times kicks in regardless of whether they’re actually in charge. If they do hold authority, their approach might seem dictatorial. Why do they act this way? A big reason is their need to be in control to achieve results. While this can be helpful for getting things done in a team or organization, it harms relationships when it steamrolls others’ needs.

When faced with sudden and intense stress, people with Controller style might lash out, using sharp and sometimes harsh words. Even though they value relationships, their focus on results can momentarily push these concerns aside.

If a Controller can’t officially take charge during a stressful moment, they might keep their feelings to themselves and bide their time until they are away from the situation. They will then take whatever action they feel is necessary, possibly disregarding previous instructions or bypassing others.

Interestingly, some Controllers will point fingers at others when things don’t go as planned, especially if those individuals had a role in the outcome. But outside of stressful situations, they’re often the ones to take the blame to shield their team, showing their loyalty and respect for those they trust.