Tension-Reaction Behavior in Relationships

This series of emails will explore tension-reaction behavior and the predictable ways each Behavior Style tends to react under stress and tension.

What is Tension-Reaction Behavior?

Many things can trigger negative emotional intensity in relationships, including things like unmet expectations, inconsiderate comments, a values violation, or receiving incorrect information. One common trigger is when someone does things that deny our behavior style needs because that typically creates confusion and frustration. When people experience this type of stress, they look for ways to reduce the overload. Some will do this by withdrawing, others by dictating, some by becoming compliant, and others by becoming more expressive. These responses to stress are types of tension-reaction behavior.

Tension-reaction behavior is an exaggerated extension of a person’s usual behavior style. For example, a process-oriented person may become even quieter than usual and withdraw to re-examine the situation, while an expedient-oriented individual may become so task-focused they are completely unaware of how people feel.

Here are three tips for managing tension-reaction behavior:

Here are two important things to remember:

By following these tips, you can learn to manage tension-reaction behavior and build stronger relationships.

If you have any questions or comments:

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